The Bright Lights of Broadway (or, Rat-tacular!)

There is nothing quite like sitting in the audience of a theater, in the plush seats at a dangerous angle with your knees brushing the seat back in front of you. Sitting there leafing through the Playbill, reading actor bios and restaurant reviews, excited about the show and wondering what exactly it is about. Waiting for the lights to go down. Watching the old couples who can afford to go to the theater frequently, escorting each other to the front rows where they will be able to see the teeth of the actors. Listening to the conversations of a fanatic teenage theater group that has already run through the entire score of the show you are about to see along with the who-will-sit-by-whom dramatics. You realize that you should've gone to the bathroom, but then it is too late and you forget about that need as the voice behind the curtain demands cell phones to be silenced; the theater lights go down, the orchestra starts up, and the curtain rises. Welcome to the theater.

As you know, New York has a little street called "Broadway". No, it isn't famous for it's humble beginnings as a Native American trail made into a main road by the Dutch. Rather, there is on particularly well lit, spectacular part of the road (about a mile) known as the theater district, which is the home of 39 theaters with 500 or more seats (thanks wikipedia). A slight tourist attraction, you may have heard of it. Maybe. In any case, I've spent some time there recently, finally catching a few performances. It's been pretty great and quite an education. I saw "The Homecoming" (it was weird), "Hairspray" (awesome teenage musical), "Applause" (typical 'nah' musical), and most recently (as in tonight-- thanks for the tickets, America Reads!) "The Farnsworth Invention" (which was about the invention of television and a really amazing performance-- I would recommend it to all of you). But I'm not going to write about any of them. Oh no. because there is something better than watching a play. And that is being on stage yourself.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I had my New York theater debut last Saturday night. Thank you, thank you for the kind applause and throwing of flowers (i said flowers, not tomatoes!). Really, it was just a bit part, but who knows, it could develope into something more, I'm keeping my options open. My darling friend Elly was the one who found this opportunity for us-- the Brooklyn Philharmonic needed some volunteers to play rats during their performance of the Pied Piper. Of course I agreed tho this whole heartedly, as did our friend Rachel. Who knew that Wagner had such theatrical talent? In any case, last week we crept about on stage, wearing lovely rat hats with ears and glowing red eyes, and threatened to eat the Pied Piper, but she hypnotized us with her music. So my scene was all of 3 minutes, and true, I didn't have any lines, and yes, I was one of 30 rats on stage. BUT, that does not mean that this isn't the start of an illustrious career in the theater that will end with me drunk and alone in a dressing room in thirty years. I channeled the character of rat. And it was rat-tacular. Elly and Rachel were simply marvalous, and it was a lovely, lovely experience. Thanks to all those who came and watched us in our theater debut!

And now, some pictures of the RATS.

Elly and Rachel in the dressing room, pre-show. Luckily, no one threw up because of nerves.



Three incredibly scary rats. We will eat you alive, starting with your toes.



Female Rats