Freedom to be Open

Freedom To Be Open by The Love Story Thief  
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After four years of dating, Derek popped the question and Kamilah accepted his proposal. But as Kamilah describes in this interview, it wasn't the years before but the subsequent break-up and counseling that really brought them together and showed her what love was, and, more importantly, how to keep it. She also dispenses some good love advice to your LST hostess, always looking for some hints on how to make love work. 

Posted via email from The Love Story Thief

At Home With John Bowe - A Bachelor’s Effort to Understand Love

via nytimes.com

I've been posting only stories that I've collected myself about love, but when I read this article about John Bowe and his own collection of love stories I couldn't resist but post it on the blog. These little clips from his interviews for this book "Us: Americans Talk About Love" are tender. This need to collect others' love stories to understand our own capacity to love isn't so unusual, and I'm glad to find another kindred collector out there (albeit jealous that he got a book deal out of it). I'm looking forward to reading his book and I think i'll post a review of it when i am done. Enjoy!

Posted via web from The Love Story Thief

I'm not a fan of the 'Single Ladies' song...

but any guy willing to rock out with me to Beyonce's "Halo" late at night can put a ring on it.

This version.



I promise, i used to have good taste in music, and i still do. It's just that there's this part of me that secretly also adores catchy pop songs and it happens to come out late at night and troll youtube. and then wants to share. Don't judge. I know you do the same, closeted Miley Cyrus fan.

big girls don't cry

For some amusing crying girl comics, check out this blog.

Laugh yourself happy

One of my new year’s resolutions is to have a positive attitude. About everything. I’m trying to be mindful about it, but was worried if it would be possible to maintain. I mean, i’m on day 4 and it is going well, but really, nothing bad has had time to happen yet.

And then I stumbled upon the golden ticket.

Laughter.

Or, to be particular, laugh yoga.

How silly! You might say. Yes, yes it is. Which is exactly the point and which is why it is so successful. The more you laugh, the more endorphins released into your blood stream. Your threshold for laughter decreases. Things become funnier, and life, simply rosier because now you can laugh about it.

I read about laugh yoga in Time Out New York, and of course wanted to try it out. An hour laughing with strangers? Sign me up! I convinced my dear friend Sindri to come with me (she needed to get over the sad day she had thinking about her boyfriend being buried in a mudslide in Brazil. He wasn’t, no where near it, but she let her imagination run off on that sad thought). So we made our way to a business building in midtown, and took an elevator down to a chiropractics office. There we sat and waited, along with a few others who were venturing out for this adventure for the first time, including a couple from London traveling the world. Hesitant, but also excited.

The doctor came in, with a big, bright smile on his face. I’m pretty sure all the laughing he does as a laugh leader is slowly turning him into an elf. We circled up, and were instructed to indroduce ourselves, as usual in most meeting. What was unusual, was the laughter following each introduction. “Hi, I’m Peter, and I’m a taxi cab driver.” Bahahahahaha! The room exploded. “I’m Mary, and I’m an actress.” Hysteria again. “I’m Richie and I’m a tourist.” “I’m Holly and I’m his girlfriend.” At this point, people are buckled over, wiping tears from their eyes. Including me, because, you see, there rule in laugh yoga is that you fake it until you make it. So, what started as a fake, over the top HAHAHA turned into a serious case of the giggles.

Throughout the hour of the most pleasant yoga I’ve ever done, we did laughing exercises- saying sorry while holding your ears out like a monkey (FYI, i’m never apologizing any other way again), an exaggerated laugh building from a small ha to a GWHAHAHAHA! How you would laugh off an embarrassing situation, or laughingly scold a naughty child. My favorite I think was the see who can hold in the laugh the longest game, because NO ONE could hold it in, and then we spent the next several minutes in belly-ache inducing laughter and tears.

There is a whole Laugh Yoga movement, with 7000 groups worldwide. In 2000, 10,000 people gathered together in Copenhagen to laugh for peace. It is really a peace movement because, as our teacher explained it to us, how can you shoot a gun if you are laughing?

I’m sold. I think I’ve found my therapy for the year. And if you are having a bad day, don’t be surprised if I mischievously suggest that we head over to a secret location one Monday night to cheer you up. Laughter is the best medicine and I’m ready for my spoonful.

Go ahead, laugh at me. It’ll do you some good.

Ben

Hm, looks like my brother Ben got ahold of my phone without me
knowing...

Almond luck!

I ran all the way aroud prospect park today and my knee didn't hurt
for the first time in forever! Woot! Thanks almond! And, I enjoyed my
run even though it is about 20 degrees outside!

Year in review...

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Started a podcast. Got an MPA. Was a photographer, nanny, and doctor's office receptionist in the matter of a month.

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Since I can't remember my resolutions from last year, I'm going to go ahead and say, no, I didn't keep them. This year I have a bunch, but they all boil down to just living more passionately. Which means to spend more time with friends I want to spend time with, doing things that are new, not just taking the path of least resistance but doing what I want to do and work for it. You know, easy things. And, read in Finnish for 15 minutes each night (one day down!)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My top babies of the year would have to go to Meghan's darling Catherine and Leila's dreamy little Paolo. Good thing I don't have to start listing all the 1-2 year-olds I know.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Michael Jackson? Other than that, no, no one that I am close to.

5. What places did you visit?
D.C. in January for the inaguration with Sarah, Costa Rica in March for my solo girl trip, sailing trip to Catalina in May, Nauvoo road trip with Emily and Ryan in June, Boston to visit baby Catherine, Megs, and Em, Vancouver for a motorcycle trip with Tyson, Utah in October for the WOW conference, and Toronto twice for holidays. Hm, I was kinda feeling like a homebody, but this isn't too shabby.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Positive attitude. I spent a lot of the year swallowed up in a dark little sad thundercloud. My life is really good, and I am determined to be happy about it, come what may.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 7th I had my heart broken. Lame, i know, but it was the first one to pop into my mind and affected my whole year. Working on erasing that from memory.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Definitely my Master's thesis/Capstone project, an implementation evaluation for a family homeless shelter. It is a massive piece of work, and I'm awfully proud of it.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I didn't find a job that I am super passionate about. I am really grateful to have a job in this economy and after all the months of unemployment and I do enjoy it. But, I just feel like I could've applied myself more to find something that will be sustainable in the long term.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I fractured a rib coughing.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A really cute winter hat that looks like it is from the 1920s and keeps my ears warm.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
All those folks who worked hard to finish school and then continued working hard for months trying to find jobs.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Glenn Beck.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent. and food. Boy, i manage to eat a lot.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Sailing! I went on a sailing trip in May and spent 4 days on a boat and seriously, just loved it so, so much.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
"Be OK" by Ingrid Michaelson. And "Empire State of Mind", of course.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? happier i think
b) thinner or fatter? fatter-- working from home makes me lazy!
c) richer or poorer? oh, poorer for sure, especially now that i have to pay loans back!

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Kissing.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Watching hulu.

20. How did you spend Christmas in 2009?
In Toronto with nearly the whole family. it was so much fun, especialyl to hang out with Sampo, who is now an adult and a darn decent one at that.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
Nope. I think i was more focused on falling out of love than in love. 2010 will be a different matter.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Parks and Recreation

23. What did you do for your birthday in 2009?
Waffles with friends at my house, Institute conference (especially that workshop on porn addiction), and dinner with lovely friends at Smorgas.

24. What was the best book you read?
The Blue Sweater, by Jacqueline Novotgraz

25. What did you want and get?
A fur sole.

26. What did you want and not get?
A knee that works without getting sore.

27. What was your favorite film of this year?
the Fantastic Mr. Fox.

28. Did you make some new friends this year?
Yes. not to knock anyone else, but Sagine and Victoria came to be major players in my life as friends this last year and pulled me out of a tough time with the unemployment thing.

29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Man, i know i sound pathetic, but to be honest, everything would've been much more bearable if I hadn't had such a hard time getting over this guy. If I could've had him erased from my memory, the rejection i felt from that wouldn't have permeated through everything else. But, I know that things just need to take their natural course and I'm a believer that things happen for a reason. Just sayin' it would've been more satisfying. Ooh, or not having any student loans. Now that would be satisfying.

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Grad student/unemployed/I-work-from-home look. Though I did also discover hot rollers and curling my hair.

31. What kept you sane?
Music. being a temple worker.

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Jude Law, as always.

33. What political issue stirred you the most?
Climate change. The world is getting warmer, and there is evidence that it is man-influenced. We don't need to argue about to what extent or what-not, we just need to make some changes in our over-consumptive lifestyles and realize that just because we don't see the effects in the U.S. doesn't mean that it isn't a reality. just ask women in small island developing states. There is no need to drive bigger cars and make things less energy efficient, because even if this thing is a hoax (which it isn't), the changes we make today will impact our children's future dramatically. And we couldn't even come up with anything in Copenhagen.

34. Who did you miss?
I miss my niece Hannele. She is almost 2 and i don't see her nearly enough.

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
There is a better way to be unemployed than just sitting on your couch depressed.